


don't go looking for what you can't handle

by wolfsheepsoup



Category: Metalocalypse, dethklok - Fandom
Genre: M/M, Sex Tapes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-08
Updated: 2013-05-08
Packaged: 2017-12-10 19:27:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,923
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/789292
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wolfsheepsoup/pseuds/wolfsheepsoup
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Murderface finds out a dirty little secret about the bands two guitarist.</p>
            </blockquote>





	don't go looking for what you can't handle

“you two were in a porno together?!” Murderface all but yelled at the two Scandinavian men who were lounging in the hot tub in Mordhus.

“yeahs, so?” Skwisgaar said as he played his unplugged guitar. “Its was long times ago,”

“yeahs! And its was in Norway too!” Toki chimed in, looking up from his drink.

“porno from Norway hun?” Murderface said looking up and holding his chin thoughtfully. “eh, eh, eh! I is knowings that face, don’t be doings whats you ares goings to dos!” Skwisgaar said shaking his finger at Murderface sternly.

“I herd something about a porno in here?” Nathan said as he slammed the doors open. “yeh! What are yer guys talkin’ about in here?” Pickles said strolling in behind the singer, drink in hand.

“theche too made a porno together! In Norway!” Murderface said motioning to Skwisgaar and Toki. “Its was long times agos!” the two yelled, shock and anger showing on there faces.

“woha, guys.” Nathan said staring at the two men in the hot tub.

“that, that’s ah, cool I gess.” Pickles said sitting down on the couch, chugging his fourth beer.

“Pickles! Guy porn is not brutal!” Nathan said turning to look at the drummer. “eh, what ever floats yer boat ther Na’than.” Pickles said staring into his drink.

“has anyones seens morderface?” Skwisgaar said looking around for the bassist. The rest of the band shook there heads. “oh, nos.” Skwisgaar said looking over at Toki, worry on both there faces.

Several days past with out anyone hearing or seeing the short tempered bassist until,

“guych! Guych! I found it!” Murderface said as he came rushing in, a black DVD case in one of his hands. Pickles and Nathan looked up from what they were doing as Murderface bent over to catch his breath.

“found what?” Nathan said flipping over the page in the book he was reading. “the Norwegian porno you jack-off!” Murderface yelled as he walked over to them.

“oh dood,” pickles said looking over, “I don’t we should watch it.” he said as he finished clipping his toenails. “why not?” Murderface said sitting down and shaking the DVD in pickles face.

“well, it could like, ruin ther hold lives and,…..yeh okay lets watch it.” Pickles said swiveling around to look at Murderface better. The bassist grind evilly as Nathan set down his book and picked up his laptop off the table next to him.

“all right we’ll watch it, but the second it gets to un-brutal were turning it off alright?” Nathan said popping open the disk drive and sliding the DVD in.

A sappy love song started to play out of the speakers as the menu started to load. The three band members stared in slight horror at a soft pink background with flowers blooming on it, and there two guitarist appeared holding each other gently and shirtless.

“aw man Murderface the hold fucking thing’s in this Norwegian gobbledygook!” Nathan said flicking his hand at the screen.

“here, gime that.” pickles said. Nathan slid the computer into the drummers large hands, and they both watched in amazement as pickles fingers flew over the keys translating the words and setting up subtitles.

“ther yeh go.” pickles said sliding the laptop back over to Nathan. “wow pickles, I uh, didn’t know you could uh, do that.” Nathan said. “eh ther are a lot ah things I can do.” pickles said leaning back a cocky smile on his face. “shch, okay, okay! Letch start this thing!” Murderface said taking the laptop into his hands and clicking on the start button.

It started out with a younger looking Skwisgaar walking down the halls of what looked to be a high school, smoking. He turned the corner and came to a stop as the camera zoomed out to show Toki getting beaten to a bloody pulp by several other boys.

 _“hey dildos! Why not try picking on some one else?”_ the subtitles read as the blond put his cigarette out on one of the boys foreheads.

“that’s kinda brutal.” Nathan mumbled as they watched a fight brake out between the boys. After the fight was won, (by Skwisgaar) the Swede pulled Toki to his feet and helped him into a room that looked like it was the nurses office.

Toki was bruised and battered, a small cut over his eyebrow was bleeding into his face.

 _“I can’t go home looking like this! My papa will get mad at me for fighting”_ Toki whispered as Skwisgaar rummaged around on screen looking for something. The blond turned around with a wet towel in hand and began to dab and clean the cut on Toki’s face.

 _“ then why don’t you come home with me little Toki?”_ Skwisgaar said as he peeled off a Band-Aid and stuck it over the cut.

 _“what should I tell anybody who asks?”_ Toki said hanging his head and blinking back tears. Skiwsgaar lifted the brunet’s head buy the chin.

 _“tell them you like it rough.”_ the blond pulled Toki into a rough kiss, causing brunet to blush bright red in the film.

After Skwisgaar pulled away, Toki whispered quietly, _“ I’ve never had uh…..sex before.”_

The Swede smiled softly and then leaned in close to Toki, brushing his hair away from his ear. He whispered back,

 _“if you come over tonight, you just might.”_ the Swede slowly licked Toki’s cheek before the screen faded out to black.

The screen faded back in to show the two males in what the band gusted to be Skwisgaar’s bedroom. They were both wearing pajamas and Skwisgaar was kissing Toki softly.

“ugh, yuck.” Murderface said quietly as he shifted to hide the slight boner he had.

 _“Skwisgaar, I’m not sure if I’m ready for…..you know.”_ Toki’s blushing was better than most women.

 _“shh,”_ Skwisgaar hushed as he started to nibble on Toki’s ear. Toki bit his lower lip tightly, the excitement he was feeling very noticeable.

 _“awh, little Toki, are you getting hard over just this?”_ One of the blonds hands slipped under Toki’s shirt doing something to him the camera couldn’t see.

“wonder how old they are in this?” Nathan mumbled, getting a shrug out of the others.

Skwisgaar pulled off Toki’s shirt, showing that even back then the Norwegian was all muscle.

 _“oh my, Toki, maybe you aren’t as little as everyone thinks?”_ the blond said, as he ran his hand over his chest playing with one of the brunets nipples. Toki gasped rather loudly, and pulled back from Skwisgaar’s touch.

 _“oh! Your hands, there so cold!”_ Toki whispered.

 _“hmm, do you like them?”_ Skwisgaar whispered as his hand slipped lower, gently stroking Toki’s still covered member.

 _“hah! That…feels…!”_ Toki’s hushed words quickly died into soft mewls of pleasure as Skwisgaar slipped down the Norwegians pajama pants and underwear.

The three men watching swallowed loudly as Toki’s hard member was exposed.

 _“oh my, your so big Toki! I don‘t know if I‘ll be able to take all of you.”_ The blond said as the camera moved to show him slowly licking along it’s underside.

 _“oh, my…”_ Toki leaned back and buried his fingers in Skwisgaar’s hair, tugging on the blond locks. Skwisgaar sucked and licked Toki until his was close to exploding, his breathy moans turned louder and louder by the Swede’s full lips. Skwisgaar pulled off Toki’s cock with a soft pop and moved to kiss the burnets abused lips again.

 _“Skwisgaar? I…think I want you to….”_ Toki stopped and bit his lower lip.

 _“what is it little Toki? What do you want me to do to you?”_ The Swede purred.

 _“ no! I couldn’t say….its too…”_ The brunet looked away his cheeks a bright red.

 _“come on little Toki, I can’t touch you with out you telling me what you want.”_ The blond said gently pulling on Toki’s long hair.

 _“I…want….you…to…f-fuck m..me.”_ Toki leaned in closer to whisper the last words into the Swedes ear. Now it was Skwisgaar’s turn to blush brightly as Toki pulled off the blonds shirt wile whispering the most depraved things to the other.

The other full grown men watching this unravel were now all blushing brightly at the things the burnet spoke off.

“Holy shit.” was the only thing any of them could say as there minds wondered to the thoughts of what the Norwegian’s lips promised.

 _“I thought you said you’ve never had sex before?”_ the Swede said Toki’s words not fazing him as badly.

 _“I said I’ve never had sex not that I’ve never…..touched myself.”_ Toki’s confidents draining from him as he spoke. Skwisgaar smirked and licked his lips slowly.

All three of the men fallowed that tongue in its path.

They watched as the Swede reached into a drawer and pulled out a bottle of lube. He gently laid Toki down on the bed, pulling his pants and underwear off. The Swede then pulled off his own garments leaving them both naked.

The others couldn’t help but swallow loudly again at the Swede’s hard and slightly dripping member.

 _“are you sure your ready butterfly?”_ Skwisgaar said gently running his fingers though Toki’s hair again. Toki nodded slowly. The Swede kissed Toki again as he uncapped the lube and squirted a fair amount on to his finger tips.

 _“now, relax and trust me okay?”_ Skwisgaar said as he slipped his pointer finger inbetween Toki’s legs gently pressing into him. The burnets face scrunched up into that of pain as he hissed tough his teeth.

 _“breath normally, and look at me butterfly.”_ These cofering words were all Toki needed as the pain slowly changed in to pleasure. Skwisgaar placed more of the lube on his own cock before pushing a second finger inside the brunet.

 _“hahhh, oh Skwisgaar!”_ the Norwegian moaned out, his back arking as long pale fingers brushed sinsative oragns.

One red-head inhaled sharply at the moaning of the Swede’s name. 

The blond slowly pulled out his fingers only to replase them with his cock. He sliped in gently, but Toki still gaspped in pain.

 _“oh, gods! You’er so big inside me!”_ Toki breathed out.

A pleasured groan muffled by a scrub at a dark mustache.

 _“oh, gods, please my demon! Fuck me now!”_ Toki mewled his voice torn by lust.

Skwisgaar began to slowly piston his hips only gaining speed on Toki’s request.

 _“oh, kiss me, kiss me and fill me up inside!”_ Toki all but yelled as Skwisgaar came crashing down on to his lips. Toki arched up again for the last time, spilling on to the blonds chest. The Swede yelled loudly as he lost himself inside the brunets body.

A denim covered knee squeesed tightly by black nails.

The video faded out, the last shot being of the two men curled up tightly next to each other sleeping.

Nathan closed his laptop eyes wide and unblinking.

“so, uh.” was all the signer could say, his voice cracking.

“ehny body else, have a really, really unwanted boner right now?” The drummer asked draining the rest of his drink. Two quick nods. “yeh, I though so.” Pickles stood, and looked back at the other two.

“you guys wana’ get shit face and do a lot a crep, we’d never do sober with each other?” The red-head asked brushing his hands off on his pants, hands ghosting deadly close to his cock. The other two looked at each other then back to pickles, and nodded.

“Lets get wasted then!” Pickles shouted as he walked away.


End file.
